I messed up, big time.

Something terrible happened to me this morning, and it made me realize that I’m going about some things the wrong way.

This blog is one of them.

Talk about Depression.

As a student nurse, I feel like I should really be mentioning a lot more posts about health promotion and awareness.

That’s why I’m going to do a Mental Health related post because its Mental Illness Awareness Week!

More specifically, today (October 10th) is National Depression Screening Day! So if you, or someone you know, has had an inkling that something is a bit off in their lives and that feeling doesn’t seem to resolve, there’s free screenings offered through the website “Help yourself. Help others.”

I’m not sure why there is such a stigma about depression, although no one can deny that it exists. People go through so much in their life times, its no wonder that the statistics for depression are so high.

I’d like to leave some of these statistics with you all so that you can become more aware of how problematic this health issue is, and why it needs to be talked about.

• 3 million men are affected by depression in the United States
• Men are 4 times as likely to die by suicide
• Women 18 to 45 years of age account for the largest proportion of people suffering from depression
• 10 percent to 15 percent of women experience a clinical depression during pregnancy or after the birth of a baby
• Latinos are more likely to present “somatic” symptoms of depression, like body aches and nervousness
• One out of four young adults will experience a depressive episode by age 24
• Suicide is the third leading cause of death for those aged 15-24 and the second leading cause of death of college students
• Depression affects more than 6.5 million of the 35 million Americans who are 65 years or older

The CDC has some more statistics and information about depression.

Depression can be caused by a variety or combination of different factors. No one chooses to be depressed. Start talking about it. Seek out resources about depression, especially those in your local community.

I recommend that you give Kevin Breel’s TED talk, “Confessions of a depressed comic” a listen as well.

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Paying it forward

Fun fact, “Midori” is green in Japanese. The more you know.

So yesterday my internet bud, Annmarie (AKA Sweet Wild Flower), decided to give me this cool anniversary present for my 1 month of blogging. I’d like to take a second to thank her for being such a positive internet buddy. I’m not so used to seeing nice people on the internet. It’s a great change.

Check out that sweet piece of jpeg! I like it, its green and its got a great adjective, more importantly its got “award” at the end of it. Everyone loves awards, right? I give myself awards all the time. The dark chocolate eater award, the best excuses to not go to the gym award, the eating a second and third breakfast this morning award. That last one is really dear to my heart. I’m basically a hobbit.

So this green stallion of an award has some rules that go along with receiving it. Which I will follow, since I don’t really break rules all that often!

Select 15 bloggers that you’ve recently discovered or follow regularly. Holy shit, that is a lot of blogs to list….okay, here goes!

1. Miami Transit Rider – Daniella’s Rants about Miami public transportation makes her blog my favorite!
2. Michael Chaney’s Blog -Michael is my favorite writer that I have been exposed to since joining wordpress!
3. Knitting, feminism and miscellaneous ranting – I WISH I KNEW MANDY IN PERSON, O GOD, SHE’S AMAZING.
4. Lafemmeroar – I get something out of every post, she’s a great writer.
5. Museums Reviewed – I have read every single post on this blog. Its re-god-damn-diculous how much I love it.
6. Hanna Brencher – I just discovered Hanna via her TEDtalk regarding her more love letters project.
7. Just Homemade – because food porn is the best kind of porn.
8. Illustrator Bites – Heather is hella talented, I love her illustrations and her blog is adorable.
9. Delightfully Tacky – I’ve been following Elizabeth since 2009, you could say that I follow her the most regularly!
10. Living Europea – I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, this couple are living my dream.
11. Map of Jo – Only recently discovered this blog, but its become my wordpress version of tumblr!
12. Little Wolf – I want to be Maryanna when I grow up.
13. Pretty Pink Pebbles – Ana has a little bit of everything!
14. Stegothesaurus – for your regular dose of flash fiction! :3
15. The Illustrious Peacock – beautiful photography, you know you want to look at it. LOOK AT IT I SAY.
16. Violent Metaphors – for when I’m feeling sassy and science-y.

[I added one for good luck!]

As per the instructions, you have all just been nominated for Versatile Blogger Award as well. Let the never-ending game of internet tag begin!

The last rule says I have to tell you guys 7 things about myself. Now you see, the problem with this is, I already did that before. So its hard for me to come up with 7 NEW things to tell you about myself. Mostly because I’ve only been awake for three hours and I’m not at home…

Luckily the Daily Prompt has come to my rescue, giving an idea as to what what I can talk about.

1. Clothes are very important to me. I need them, or else I’d be naked. That may sound a bit obvious, but, really, I don’t want to be walking around naked. Mostly because I get cold very easily. I’m not sure why I’m always perpetually cold, maybe its bad circulation. Regardless, I need clothes so that I don’t feel like one of those shivering hairless cats. I AM A BEAR, and thus require a warm coat of fur. I prefer to be bear than bare, GET IT? O GOD IM NOT EVEN KIND OF FUNNY.

2. When I was growing up my style was that of a tom boy. All I did when I was a kid was play with my brothers toys and video games. My mother attempted to dress me up in skirts and poofy dresses, but these efforts were always met with retaliation. I remember at some point my parents started buying us clothing a few sizes up so that we would grow into them. I ended up stealing my brothers pants and shirts that were too big for him. I don’t think he minded much…but I never actually asked, lol.

3. When I was in highschool my style was that of a hottopic poster child. I wasn’t the happiest of kids when I moved back to the states. I was pretty depressed that America and American teenagers were not at all how I pictured them.  So I think that’s why I started listening to really dark music. I say dark, because it involved the color black. Lots of black. I think I wore only black for like a good solid two years of my life. Sometimes I’d add in some bright colors, but most of the time…just black. I had those giant over sized baggy pants, the ones where it looked like I was hiding a small child in each pant leg. I didn’t own shirts that weren’t band shirts. Seriously. I had spikey wrist bracelets and wore clunky metal necklaces. My backpack was filled with band patches and I only listened to black metal, death metal, speed metal or alternative bands. And I had a livejournal (does that still exist?). Basically, I was your average angsty teen.

4. My style today is a little bit of everything. I enjoy skirts and dresses again, lol, I’m glad I got over that. I also love the shit out of bermuda shorts. Best. Invention. Ever. If I’m not wearing flip flops its because I’m going to the gym. If I’m going dancing I never wear heels…as I learned the hard way that bar hopping and clubbing require a lot of footwork. I have a shit ton of novelty t-shirts. I have star wars, star trek, band shirts, a tuxedo shirt, super hero shirts, I even have a Powerthirst shirt – for when I decide that I need to be uncomfortably energetic! I also have a wonderful pile of more fashionable tops, but I never seem to find occasions to wear them.

5. My style as a nursing student screams yoga pants and college t-shirts…Mostly because I don’t sleep much, I wake up early, I spend my days studying and I have no life. Don’t judge me; you’d dress like this too. The only permanent addition to my wardrobe since starting nursing school is a watch. I never regularly wore watches before, but now I feel weird if I go a day without one. Maybe one day, when I’m a super adult, I’ll get a cool galaxy gear watch…until then, I can only hope to buy a Casio calculator watch. Those are the fucking coolest.

6. Clothes you will never see me in: overalls or no-sleeve tees. There was this one time, when I went to Japan with my girl friend Kim, that the cool peeps we were hanging out with took us to the beach and we had nothing to wear for such an occasion. So we went to a nearby clothing store, but the cheapest clothing we found were a pair of overalls…one pink and one yellow. We ended up purchasing them because our friends told us that they looked cute, and they pushed us to buy them. We looked so absolutely ridiculous. We looked like Pink Mario and Wario. It was so embarrassing. All picture evidence has since been burned. The no-sleeve thing is related, once again, to my dislike of being cold. Speaking of which, something you will ALWAYS see me carrying: a sweater or jacket. I never leave home without one.

7. My favorite article of clothing is my hello kitty snuggie. I consider it an article of clothing…even though if you want to get technical, I’m pretty sure its more of a robe-blanket. MAD? MAD CAUSE I GOT A HELLO KITTY SNUGGIE? You should be.

BAAAAAAAAAAM. Two birds, one early morning stone. Done and done! I’m ready for second breakfast now.

 

Us Are Not [leet]

Gather round boys and girls, its story time.

My friend Brett has been having some tough times. Right now, so am I, so I feel his pain. Therefore, in an effort to cheer him up, and because I feel like it, I’ve decided to tell the story of our friendship.

Three years ago…wait…no…Four years ago, on the internet, I met one of the greatest bros of all time. It was in the game Guild Wars that I would have the privilege of getting to know the funniest guild I have ever been in. That guild, was Us Are Not [leet]. Here’s a group picture that I made a long time ago, we are a good looking bunch, amirite?

I have been using MS Paint for a while, as you can see.

Anyway, I had just moved to pursue nursing as my second degree, so I didn’t know a lot of people in the new place I was living in. So, naturally, I spent a lot of time gaming. Thus, I spent a lot of time bonding, with Us Are Not.  One of the peeps that I got to know very well was Bretty poo. This is Brett:

Brett is a very energetic dude, and super funny, so naturally we got along quite well. It just so happened that I was going to be in one of the northern states visiting family, and Brett was like “OMG I’LL DRIVE OVER TO MEET YOU!” So I was like, “OKAY!” And so he did, and we hung out for a bit – making this the first time ever that I met a person who I played online with!  It wasn’t a very long meeting, because he had to drive back, obviously. But we had some tasties, and tasties are always the best. Also we went into a “Giant” which is a super market chain only in the northern part of the U.S. In it we proceeded to try and find all of the purple and yellow things we could. Also we attempted to drive a truck that was clearly too small for us; we were giants in the Giant.

O GOD BRETT, YOU’RE STEERING IT INTO ONCOMING TRAFFIC

 The funniest thing about us meeting was that when I first saw him I kind of just touched his face for like a good ten minutes. It’s weird, and hard to explain. But, when you have talked to someone for a while and you never actually met them in person, the first time you see that person face-to-face there’s like this realization of OMG YOU DO EXIST. I mean, I knew he was a real person before, but now there’s an actual person. So I poked his face a few times.

When I think of Brett, three things come to mind.

(1) ENERGETIC. Brett always a great attitude about stuff and a lot of energy. He isn’t without his limit, he is human, but its always good to know someone who is up for anything.

(2) CONVERSATIONALIST. He is an awesome person to talk to, regardless of what topic you decide to discuss. He can talk for several hours, as he has proven, and always has something funny to say.

(3) MUSICIAN. Brett has a musical famly, so I am not surprised that he is a musician himself. I also recall that he created some comedic raps, which I also participated in, in the name of Gerby! (Gerby is a long story…but, I wish we still had our old guild website up, I would quote some of our “sick” “flow” – but alas, the forums were deleted a while back) I’m always up for any music he may recommend.

Brett is but a baby (yer so widdle and younnng) so he has a big future ahead of him, I can feel it. For now, I hope you stay optimistic and continue being hilarious. C:

 

 

 

 

 

            
 

I AM TECH SUPPORT!

Disclaimer: I have never been, nor do I claim to be, a computer expert of any kind. The following story is based on true events that happened to me yesterday. All information regarding the incident was found off of google, my friend Kauf (a programmer), my friend Luuk (a person who knows what memory sticks are) and my own brain. If this isn’t how these things work, I am not the least bit surprised. At some point I will claim to be a computer wizard, I’d like to mention now that I do not and have never practiced magic. I was, however, my own tech support. Let me bask in this moment, okay? I did something without others present. THIS IS LIKE A HUGE LIFE ACCOMPLISHMENT. (Also, kind of magical)

Friends, I wish to tell you a little story.

It all started when I was typing up some essays yesterday, you know, normal nursing school stuff…when something happened to me. My computer screen suddenly went blank.

Naturally I immediately assumed it had something to do with the cable that runs from my magical computer box (tower) to my monitor. But I was interrupted mid-thought by a high pitched, upset, demonic noise suddenly erupting from my desktop tower.

My response, as it is when anything goes wrong with digital devices, was to turn off the computer. So I did. I waited a few seconds…and a few more, then I turned it back on. To my dismay, my tower was still singing its raging digital acapella. WTF IS HAPPENING??? OGOD.

Initially I of course, because I am a catastrophic thinker, went to the worst possible scenario; I killed it. I must have somehow offended my tower to the point of hardware suicide. It was failing to thrive. My computer was dying and this was its final Cheyne-Stokes breathes. I turned it off and went into full TECH PANIC MODE.

I texted a few people, but when no one responded,  I called my friend Kauf. I don’t recall most of the phone call in much detail, it was a blur of anxiety, but I do remember Kauf telling me that my computer’s beeps were a code. A code? Well, shit. What kind of code are we talking here? It wants to communicate with me, I’m okay with that, I’ll go into the grid! WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO TO TALK WITH IT???

Unfortunately, my call was badly timed, as Kauf was in the middle of a Final Fantasy XIV Online raid.  I apologized for the frantic phone call, said goodbye, and just sat on the floor staring at my computer tower.

A code? My sweet, innocent tower, what is it that you want to tell me? Is this in binary? Is binary even a language? Are there other languages? Oh sweet Jesus, I hope this isn’t the audio version of C++…for a moment the scene from Zoolander came to mind… I don’t understand.  LET ME HELP YOU.

With no options left, and millions of unanswered questions, I knew there was only one thing left to try. Google it.

I ran for my laptop and ferociously finger stabbed my keyboard until the google screen appeared. When you type into google “dying computer noises” you actually get free sound clips of what, I presume, a computer sounds like when its dying. Which is random and cool at the same time, but of no use to me. So I tried “computer noises + code” (Kauf mentioned it, so I should have probably used that in the search…) and BAM, answers!

The beepies are  “beep codes” that are used by something called BIOS (basic input output system). The BIOS is the lord of the boots! Boots being the booting up process of a computer. BIOS is the tower guardian.

Mr. BIOS was letting me know that shit was going down in my tower. OH GOD HOW DO I COMMUNICATE WITH YOU MR. BIOS??? Easy, back to google. I searched “HP BIOS codes” – and lo and behold, I had found it. THE ROSETTA STONE FOR HP DESKTOP TOWER BIOS BEEPS. OH WHAT A GLOOOOOORIOUS DAY!

I listened again to my tower’s beep message, it wasn’t random complaints,  oh no, no sir. My computer was speaking to me. He was saying “ONE SHORT BEEP AND A LONG BEEP. ONE SHORT BEEP AND A LONG BEEP. HEY, ARE YOU GETTING THIS? I MEAN I CAN KEEP GOING, BUT I FEEL LIKE I’M JUST REPEATING MYSELF AT THIS POINT. ONE SHORT BEEP AND A LONG BEEP.”

I’ll spare you the suspense, it was a memory problem. I tore open my tower and searched for the culprits. Two, very suspicious, RAM sticks were just sitting there…acting like nothing had fucking happened. YOU DON’T FOOL ME, DEVIANTS!

I took one of the sticks of RAM out, tried to turn my computer on again, but he was still cranky and repeating the memory BIOS code. So I put that one back and took out the other one. The most magical thing happened when I pressed the power…MY COMPUTER BOOTED. It brought a tear to my eye. But I couldn’t celebrate just yet…my computer is hella old, I can’t just survive off of one memory stick for long. Looking at the motherboard, where the stick holders (not the technical term) were located I took note that two of them were black and two of them were blue. The memory sticks had been in the blue slots, so, I moved both sticks into the black slots and tried turning on the computer.

SUCCESS. I had never been so happy to see my monitor screen’s ten minute long Windows Starting logo.

Then it dawned on me. This is the first time, ever, in the history of my life, that I fixed a hardware computer problem BY MYSELF. AND IT FELT GLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORIOUS! 

To reward myself, I went on a magical internet browsing journey where I accomplished nothing, and it felt great. The moral of this story is, wait no, there’s no moral to this story. This is just what happened to me yesterday.

But, there was a take away message from all this, and that is – I AM A COMPUTER WIZARD, I DON’T NEED TECH SUPPORT, I AM TECH SUPPORT *drops a mic* DEUCES.

 

 

 

 

 

 

            

One Lovely Blog Award!

So, I can’t even believe I’m saying this…but…I was nominated for an award.

I’m not making this shit up. Blame Michael Chaney. He did it.

So those of you who don’t know Michael, he’s got seven facts of his own over at his blog. He’s pretty cool too, he writes things that you should read. Thought provoking things. Next level shit. So, I would re-nominate him, but I don’t think that’s how this thing works.

Oh, but it gets better, there are some pass along rules associated with this pink, glorious jpeg!

“The One Lovely Blog Award requires that I give seven facts about myself and nominate another five recipients.”

So, here’s seven things about Super Saiyan M…

1. Guild Wars. I played it the most consistently and vigorously than any other game in my life. It’s also the first MMORPG I was introduced to.  I’ve actually made several friends through the game, I’ve met two of them in person.

2. I lived overseas for 11 years. I have been to 27 countries, but only 3 states. I wish to continue to travel; I have more places in mind! My dream is to end up in a cool big city for a while, with like coffee shops everywhere (not Starbucks, I’m talking hipster shit).

3. My biggest pet peeve is people being on their smart phones. I’d be more specific but really I think you know what I mean… When the person you are having a conversation with hasn’t looked up from their phone screen. The guy who bumps into you because he was on his phone. The person who interrupts you mid-sentence to show you a vine video…or a facebook status…or a tweet. Come on people, why do you do that??? Seriously.

4. The most liberating thing I have ever experienced, was losing my phone. I was no longer in charge of anything, I had an excuse for everything. And everyone  had zero expectations for me showing up or responding to anything. It was glorious. However, after this happened a second, third and fourth time, I have to say this feeling was quickly replaced with more darker emotions.

5. I have been reading comic books since I was a wee child (any Psylocke fans?), I collected trading cards, and I watched anything with superheros on television. I’ve been pretty obsessed with super hero and comic culture for the majority of my life.

6. Scent is like my favorite sense. I get it, hearing is cool and seeing is like super important. But smelling is where its at. The smell of food gets me every time. I have purchased more perfumes than I’d like to admit. Every gift I give to one of my girl friends is usually scented. I can identify every bath gel, shampoo or conditioner that I own by its scent. Since being in nursing school I’ve spent a shit ton of money on scented antibacterial soaps and hand sanitizers. I crave certain smells, which is why I have a lot of candles as well. I also am keen on what my friends smell like. This may sound creepy, but its how I operate.  Equally strange, I suppose, is that I can block or minimize other scents. It’s a weird super power to have. The worst is when I have allergies (which happens far too often) and I can’t smell anything at all.

7.  I’m a bear. Evidence:

Ferocious clawing action going on! Hide yer kids, hide yer food!

Now, the nominations, cause I got to select la crème de la crème of wordpress writers…that I am subscribed to.

1. Miami Transit Rider: If you know Miami, then you know bad driving. If you know Miami driving , then you know frustration. But, if you take the public transportation in Miami, then you are Daniela. And I suggest reading along for a ride that you will surely be able to relate to. Her rants are awesome.

2. The Global Citizens Blog: I’m not sure if this kind of blog counts, but I’mma nominate it anyway. It’s a really interesting blog to follow, each post is by a different student who is partaking in the Victoria Overseas Exchange (Vic OE) exchange student program. I love reading about what each person is doing, their new experiences and what they’re learning along the way.

3. Keep Culture Weird; I like Dave’s posts. I’d say more, but really you should read it, cause its hard to sum up all of them. Several, several guest posts made on the blog are by his students, all good fun reading.

4. zi0otography: I’m obsessed with the photography that’s posted on this blog. It’s beautifully captured and captivating. :D Also there are pictures of the Netherlands right now, because I guess the photographer is passing through.

5. Museums Reviewed: This is the shit. It’s literally posts about museums – which are basically my favorite thing. A Polish guy in the Netherlands guides you through the good ones, the bad ones, all of them really. It’s the fucking best. I’m not sure why you’re still reading this…you should have clicked the link and investigated by now.

6. SaSa Stories: Sarah is studying marine biology in Groningen, cause she’s a bad ass. I love reading about her adventures, she is so adorable it hurts. Her blog still seems relatively new. But I’m not judging…I’ve only had this blog for a month lol.

7. Blogging Robin:  I have to support my fellow nursing students! Cassandra is a Canadian nursing student who I can closely relate to. She also feels that shopping is a disease… Once again, this is more of a new comer to the wordpress world.

My work here is done.