I'm just Super Saiyan

No one tells me anything, just saiyan…


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Us Are Not [leet]

Gather round boys and girls, its story time.

My friend Brett has been having some tough times. Right now, so am I, so I feel his pain. Therefore, in an effort to cheer him up, and because I feel like it, I’ve decided to tell the story of our friendship.

Three years ago…wait…no…Four years ago, on the internet, I met one of the greatest bros of all time. It was in the game Guild Wars that I would have the privilege of getting to know the funniest guild I have ever been in. That guild, was Us Are Not [leet]. Here’s a group picture that I made a long time ago, we are a good looking bunch, amirite?

I have been using MS Paint for a while, as you can see.

Anyway, I had just moved to pursue nursing as my second degree, so I didn’t know a lot of people in the new place I was living in. So, naturally, I spent a lot of time gaming. Thus, I spent a lot of time bonding, with Us Are Not.  One of the peeps that I got to know very well was Bretty poo. This is Brett:

Brett is a very energetic dude, and super funny, so naturally we got along quite well. It just so happened that I was going to be in one of the northern states visiting family, and Brett was like “OMG I’LL DRIVE OVER TO MEET YOU!” So I was like, “OKAY!” And so he did, and we hung out for a bit – making this the first time ever that I met a person who I played online with!  It wasn’t a very long meeting, because he had to drive back, obviously. But we had some tasties, and tasties are always the best. Also we went into a “Giant” which is a super market chain only in the northern part of the U.S. In it we proceeded to try and find all of the purple and yellow things we could. Also we attempted to drive a truck that was clearly too small for us; we were giants in the Giant.

O GOD BRETT, YOU’RE STEERING IT INTO ONCOMING TRAFFIC

 The funniest thing about us meeting was that when I first saw him I kind of just touched his face for like a good ten minutes. It’s weird, and hard to explain. But, when you have talked to someone for a while and you never actually met them in person, the first time you see that person face-to-face there’s like this realization of OMG YOU DO EXIST. I mean, I knew he was a real person before, but now there’s an actual person. So I poked his face a few times.

When I think of Brett, three things come to mind.

(1) ENERGETIC. Brett always a great attitude about stuff and a lot of energy. He isn’t without his limit, he is human, but its always good to know someone who is up for anything.

(2) CONVERSATIONALIST. He is an awesome person to talk to, regardless of what topic you decide to discuss. He can talk for several hours, as he has proven, and always has something funny to say.

(3) MUSICIAN. Brett has a musical famly, so I am not surprised that he is a musician himself. I also recall that he created some comedic raps, which I also participated in, in the name of Gerby! (Gerby is a long story…but, I wish we still had our old guild website up, I would quote some of our “sick” “flow” – but alas, the forums were deleted a while back) I’m always up for any music he may recommend.

Brett is but a baby (yer so widdle and younnng) so he has a big future ahead of him, I can feel it. For now, I hope you stay optimistic and continue being hilarious. C:

 

 

 

 

 

            
 


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I AM TECH SUPPORT!

Disclaimer: I have never been, nor do I claim to be, a computer expert of any kind. The following story is based on true events that happened to me yesterday. All information regarding the incident was found off of google, my friend Kauf (a programmer), my friend Luuk (a person who knows what memory sticks are) and my own brain. If this isn’t how these things work, I am not the least bit surprised. At some point I will claim to be a computer wizard, I’d like to mention now that I do not and have never practiced magic. I was, however, my own tech support. Let me bask in this moment, okay? I did something without others present. THIS IS LIKE A HUGE LIFE ACCOMPLISHMENT. (Also, kind of magical)

Friends, I wish to tell you a little story.

It all started when I was typing up some essays yesterday, you know, normal nursing school stuff…when something happened to me. My computer screen suddenly went blank.

Naturally I immediately assumed it had something to do with the cable that runs from my magical computer box (tower) to my monitor. But I was interrupted mid-thought by a high pitched, upset, demonic noise suddenly erupting from my desktop tower.

My response, as it is when anything goes wrong with digital devices, was to turn off the computer. So I did. I waited a few seconds…and a few more, then I turned it back on. To my dismay, my tower was still singing its raging digital acapella. WTF IS HAPPENING??? OGOD.

Initially I of course, because I am a catastrophic thinker, went to the worst possible scenario; I killed it. I must have somehow offended my tower to the point of hardware suicide. It was failing to thrive. My computer was dying and this was its final Cheyne-Stokes breathes. I turned it off and went into full TECH PANIC MODE.

I texted a few people, but when no one responded,  I called my friend Kauf. I don’t recall most of the phone call in much detail, it was a blur of anxiety, but I do remember Kauf telling me that my computer’s beeps were a code. A code? Well, shit. What kind of code are we talking here? It wants to communicate with me, I’m okay with that, I’ll go into the grid! WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO TO TALK WITH IT???

Unfortunately, my call was badly timed, as Kauf was in the middle of a Final Fantasy XIV Online raid.  I apologized for the frantic phone call, said goodbye, and just sat on the floor staring at my computer tower.

A code? My sweet, innocent tower, what is it that you want to tell me? Is this in binary? Is binary even a language? Are there other languages? Oh sweet Jesus, I hope this isn’t the audio version of C++…for a moment the scene from Zoolander came to mind… I don’t understand.  LET ME HELP YOU.

With no options left, and millions of unanswered questions, I knew there was only one thing left to try. Google it.

I ran for my laptop and ferociously finger stabbed my keyboard until the google screen appeared. When you type into google “dying computer noises” you actually get free sound clips of what, I presume, a computer sounds like when its dying. Which is random and cool at the same time, but of no use to me. So I tried “computer noises + code” (Kauf mentioned it, so I should have probably used that in the search…) and BAM, answers!

The beepies are  “beep codes” that are used by something called BIOS (basic input output system). The BIOS is the lord of the boots! Boots being the booting up process of a computer. BIOS is the tower guardian.

Mr. BIOS was letting me know that shit was going down in my tower. OH GOD HOW DO I COMMUNICATE WITH YOU MR. BIOS??? Easy, back to google. I searched “HP BIOS codes” – and lo and behold, I had found it. THE ROSETTA STONE FOR HP DESKTOP TOWER BIOS BEEPS. OH WHAT A GLOOOOOORIOUS DAY!

I listened again to my tower’s beep message, it wasn’t random complaints,  oh no, no sir. My computer was speaking to me. He was saying “ONE SHORT BEEP AND A LONG BEEP. ONE SHORT BEEP AND A LONG BEEP. HEY, ARE YOU GETTING THIS? I MEAN I CAN KEEP GOING, BUT I FEEL LIKE I’M JUST REPEATING MYSELF AT THIS POINT. ONE SHORT BEEP AND A LONG BEEP.”

I’ll spare you the suspense, it was a memory problem. I tore open my tower and searched for the culprits. Two, very suspicious, RAM sticks were just sitting there…acting like nothing had fucking happened. YOU DON’T FOOL ME, DEVIANTS!

I took one of the sticks of RAM out, tried to turn my computer on again, but he was still cranky and repeating the memory BIOS code. So I put that one back and took out the other one. The most magical thing happened when I pressed the power…MY COMPUTER BOOTED. It brought a tear to my eye. But I couldn’t celebrate just yet…my computer is hella old, I can’t just survive off of one memory stick for long. Looking at the motherboard, where the stick holders (not the technical term) were located I took note that two of them were black and two of them were blue. The memory sticks had been in the blue slots, so, I moved both sticks into the black slots and tried turning on the computer.

SUCCESS. I had never been so happy to see my monitor screen’s ten minute long Windows Starting logo.

Then it dawned on me. This is the first time, ever, in the history of my life, that I fixed a hardware computer problem BY MYSELF. AND IT FELT GLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORIOUS! 

To reward myself, I went on a magical internet browsing journey where I accomplished nothing, and it felt great. The moral of this story is, wait no, there’s no moral to this story. This is just what happened to me yesterday.

But, there was a take away message from all this, and that is – I AM A COMPUTER WIZARD, I DON’T NEED TECH SUPPORT, I AM TECH SUPPORT *drops a mic* DEUCES.

 

 

 

 

 

 

            


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Stress Eaters – Part 1

“Stressed is desserts spelled backwards.” FUCK THAT GUY. Yeah, fuck whoever first said that crap. “Pots” is “Stop” spelled backward, welcome to palindrome land! Where there is no hidden meanings, shit just happens to spell things when the letters are read backwards!

Some of you may be saying “Whoa, chill out bro. You mad?” To which I would like to respond, “Yes, good sir or madam. Yes I am.” Get ready for a long post.

The reason I’m mad is because I’ve been stress eating everything in sight. Yesterday I was cleaning up my room (something that deserves a whole post by itself) and I all of a sudden got overwhelmed with how long this is going to take to finish. This feeling was quickly followed by the sudden, dire need to eat cupcakes. FUCK! I wanted cupcakes so bad. I had just had lunch too, but my body doesn’t care, its not here to make sense…its here to make me happy. And you know what makes me the happiest little school girl? CUPCAKES. So then I started having that inner battle, the one where you argue with yourself about how you really, really don’t need cupcakes but you really, really, really need cupcakes. If you have never had this battle before, fuck you. I’m sorry, that was harsh, I’m sure you have some kind of Kryptonite – pizza perhaps? Or are you into those little cake pops? Or full blown ice cream from the container? Do you get what I’m saying here? This is part of our lives folks. Hence why I want to smack whoever said “stressed is desserts backwards” in the face. You trying to be cute? It’s not cute. THIS IS MY LIFE. My life is not a catchphrase! Oh God. This…is my life.

So I broke down and bought cookies. Yes, its one step down from cupcakes, but I’m still not proud of myself. Icing makes me weak willed. Anyway, I started thinking more and more about stress eating, or emotional eating. Emotional eating didn’t pop up out of no where guys, this shit is deep rooted in our psyche.  Lifelong behavioral conditioning has taught us that doing something right should be rewarded with a piece of candy. Nailing that report card grade deserves a greasy night out dinning.  Making it through your period deserves chocolate. Shit, living with the fact that you have periods means you deserve chocolate. As if that wasn’t enough, your body gets rewarded with food chemicals that give you pleasures. Yes, pleasure.

Ever heard of serotonin or anandamide? Serotonin is a hormone associated with the infatuation you feel related to love. And anandamide is literally known as the “bliss molecule” – its a neurotransmitter that binds to your brain receptors similarly as THC (marijuana) does. Chocolate is full of these two guys. Guess what happens when you eat a piece of chocolate and your body gets flooded full of happy chemicals; your brain sends endorphins back. Yes, endorphins.  This is just the chocolate example, but I think you get where I’m going with this.

While no one is going to deny that happy events in any given person’s life probably had some junk food involved (happy birthday cake anyone?), there is a new study saying that this isn’t exactly where emotional or stress eaters get their drive to down those baddie foods in times of need.

According to a small (12 volunteer) recent study, there are hormones in your stomach that are sending signals to your brain that aren’t linked to any specific food at all.  The study’s experimental subject group were given saturated fats, while the control subject group was given a saline solution; both to the point of satiation. Tummies full, they were shown images of sad faces and listened to sad music, and guess what – neither group was hungrier after that.

What does this mean? This means that emotional eating is both psychological and biological.  Its just that more work has to be done in order to really figure out whats happening biologically. Lukas Van Oudenhove, one of the authors of this study, had this to say:

“Evolution has made every aspect of feeding as rewarding as possible… These days it may not be a good thing anymore. When food is available anywhere, then it may be a bad thing, leading to obesity or eating disorders in some people.”

Susan Albers, Psy.D., a Cleveland Clinic psychologist, added:

“Given the strong soothing effect of food on a biological level, we have to work even harder to find ways to soothe and comfort ourselves without calories… This is important in the long run for managing your weight, improving your self-esteem, and protecting your overall health.”

But while top researchers continue to study these findings and carry out additional studies, I’d like to follow up this post with Stress Eaters – Part 2. 

 

 

 

 

 

            


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Le Fitness Goal

So, as I previously mentioned, I’m attempting to regain healthiness. That includes the shedding of fatties. So here’s the situation:

I don’t think I should be this shape. This is not a normal human shape. As you can see, the situation has really gotten out of control. To start addressing the many not-good-for-me lifestyle habits I’ve acquired I have to identify the etiologies and target them to ensure change.

So, nursing school causes a lot of problems that are not great for a healthy lifestyle; namely hours upon hours of sitting down and studying with no physical activity. Q___Q. Yeah, that’s not going to change, but a lighter load this semester does give me a bit of a break.

Shitty food is related to stress. When I stress out I eat foodies, I believe the coined term is “stress eater”…don’t judge me. This I can change easily, and have already been attempting to, so I have faith that I can change this. Its more the length of time that I can maintain a healthy diet that I  am not so sure about.

As for the videyas, when I had downtime from studying I went straight for something mindless but entertaining enough to relieve stress: MMOs??? God damn it, I took a break from sitting down and studying to sit down some more. So, as of right now, and for the past few months, I haven’t really been playing any videyas. Recently I’ve been driving around, visiting family & friends, reading a shit ton of books…basically I haven’t been home to werk my desk top. But, to be honest, I just haven’t felt like playing anything. Getting back into books has been really exciting and when I feel like giving that a break I go straight for some television shows. Granted, I’m swapping sitting at my computer for sitting with a book, or sitting and watching TV/TEDtalks, so not a lot of activity going on there. But if I’m going to be physically active for at least an hour a day, I guess it doesn’t matter how many books I read?

Here’s my goal: work out at least an hour every day, eat healthy small meals throughout the day, monitor my body measurements – not my weight.

So I want any tips anyone has for keeping on track with a diet or physical activity regiment. Or if you have any recommendations for books :3 cause yeah, I’ve been doing a lot of that – doesn’t matter the genre!