
BARE FEET IS HOW WE ROLL, SHOES ARE FOR ZUMBA NERDS
When I’m at my apartment I chill with my brother a lot. I love that kid. My brother has told me before that he wanted to try yoga. He and I used to be gym buddies. But lately our sleep schedules haven’t quite been overlapping all that much and to avoid sitting at my computer chair on a daily basis I push myself to go to the gym at around 6-6:30am; when, unfortunately, my brother is still snoozing. I miss tag teaming with him at the gym, but if I don’t push myself to go to work out then it doesn’t happen.
So recently, I’ve been riding solo to the YMCA closest to my apartment (I have a free membership through my university). When I get there I pop on my earphones and get in the zone. I don’t talk to anyone really (its mostly empty in the mornings), and I try to do a little bit of something in each of the rooms (weight room, cardio machine room, other machine room, etc..).

SQUATS ON SQUATS ON SQUATS
Well, one day, I decided to do my work out out of order (usually I do cardio first in the cardio machine room), I started in the weight room and did some squats. On my way back to the central area of the YMCA I saw that people were setting up for a yoga class in the main group workout area.
Now, I have tried yoga before, I think four years ago. It was not the most pleasant of experiences. When I was completing my first degree my university dropped some mad amount of money on a new gym and recreational center for its main campus. Kosmonat and I decided to explore the group exercises one day and we ended up going to a yoga class.
This class was hard as fuck. The yoga instructor would keep saying things like “I can see we have some new people” and “Try and keep up if you’re just a beginner” or “These are simple positions so it should be easy for our beginners”… I think those comments just made me look like a bigger jack ass for not being able to pretzel my way into whatever the hell position she was trying to make us do. I literally fell on my face the majority of the time and the other half of the time I was asking Naty if it looked like I was doing it right. To which she would tell me she had no idea.
That yoga class was going 150 miles an hour and I didn’t understand any of it.
Fast forward to my curious gym morning this past week, I cringed at the sign that said yoga. Gross. But then I thought about how my brother really wanted to try the yoga sessions at this gym. As more and more people started piling in I found myself just kind of standing there looking at all of them. Then I thought, “You know what? I don’t feel like doing cardio…so fuck it”. I grabbed a mat, took off my shoes and sat my ass down.
A really thin, short haired blonde woman made her way to the front of the class, she had a super cute yoga outfit on. And when she opened her mouth, a super strong Russian accent coated her words.
OH SHIT, I LOVE HER ALREADY. This is gonna be good.
So I was pleasantly surprised to find that my instructor was far more easy going and explanatory than my previous experience. She would give two to three suggestions about alternative positions we could make if we wanted to “challenge” ourselves. As in, if we were more advanced. So the majority of her instructions were for the most basic positions. AKA – PERFECT FOR ME.
She was also really big on the calming and relaxation part of yoga, which is cool because I could use more of that to subdue my anxiety. Her inhale and exhale instructions were really detailed – from your nose, from your mouth, while lifting your arms or lowering your leg. It was awesome.
This was the bomb. I was able to follow every instruction using one method or another. I felt like a badass.
And, to my surprise, I was drenched in sweat by the end of the session. I had no idea that yoga could make me feel like I had just done a twelve mile marathon without so much as moving one foot in each direction of my mat.
I enjoyed myself so much that I think I’ll be incorporating these yoga sessions into my weekly gym routine.
What about you guys? Have you ever tried yoga before? Was it everything you’d dreamed it would be? Or was it a huge ball of festering failure?
October 19, 2013 at 9:03 am
A fun yoga class AND you get to entertain yourself with someone’s accent, I can see why you enjoyed yourself so much! Also I have never tried yoga, don’t think I ever will. People in my family are as flexible as a brick, and I am no exception.
Also cool shirt bro, I heard you lift.
October 19, 2013 at 9:31 am
LOL! I loveeee her accent so much! I think if you try as much as you can during yoga it can help you a bit with flexibility, like, maybe you can become 1/3rd of a brick’s flexibility :D
Bro, you heard right, I do lift.
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October 19, 2013 at 9:31 am
Your posts are amazing. I mean it. Little more fun and laughs can be found on the interwebz than what I get here. And your pictures just add to it all. So good!
That’s awesome how the second class went. That first one sounded like utter hell. I would’ve bailed pretty swiftly. The second I may have actually stuck around. That accent would’ve helped. Haha. I did yoga once. I’m 6’4 and as agile as, I don’t know… a house. So it’s not my cup of tea. At all. But the class I got was really chilled and she too was interested in the relaxing form of it all, which is definitely the way to go. Your bro is brave, good luck to him!
October 19, 2013 at 9:42 am
LOL!!! Thanks man. I think houses can be pretty agile, like…if you live in a hammock. BRO YOU ARE SO GAD DAMN TALL. JEEZE. I hope that everyone is able to take yoga lessons from an adorably tiny Russian instructor, it is the best. I’m glad your experience was a relaxing one as well. I told my brother about it when I came home, but the yoga classes are really early in the morning, so hopefully one of these days he can wake up at the crack of dawn with me. LOL I’ll let him know he has supporters of his yoga ambitions, thanks again EJ :)
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October 19, 2013 at 11:52 am
I like doing Yoga too. I learned how to practice it from my aunt. I can do around 10 positions which I think they are for beginners.
Love your cartoon in Yoga positions. Looked like we have some common positions ;)
October 19, 2013 at 12:08 pm
I wish I had a cool aunt who would team me yoga lol, that’s more positions than I know, so you’re basically a super yoga master in my eyes.
Thanks, I hope to add more poses to my knowledge bank…perhaps I will draw them as I become a super yoga saiyan.
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October 19, 2013 at 3:19 pm
oh man, here they have this class called Budokon Yoga. I didn’t know what that was, but it had ‘yoga’ in it and I like yoga so I thought, “Hey! I like yoga! This will be fun!”
I couldn’t laugh or yawn or stretch for the rest of the week. :< Never. Again.
October 19, 2013 at 4:05 pm
O.O What is this budokon…I’mma google it, one sec.
OH SHIT
APPARENTLY BUDOKON MEANS “Way of the Spiritual Warrior”
KIM YOU WERE IN PAIN BECAUSE YOU WERE EVOLVING INTO A SPIRIT WARRIOR TO WRECK THE FACES OF YOUR ENEMIES. I assume that’s what it means at least. I’m pretty jealous of you.
October 20, 2013 at 8:29 pm
I wasn’t jealous of myself. Everything hurt D: coughing was bad and sneezing… oh man, sneezing was the worst!
My body can’t take being a warrior apparently. x.x
October 20, 2013 at 8:35 pm
You were in pain because warriors make pain happen. You warriored yoruself. Or something. I’m sure of it!
October 20, 2013 at 8:39 pm
if there would have been a zombie outbreak, I wouldn’t have been able to run and I would have died faster. I like, anti-warriored myself
October 20, 2013 at 8:41 pm
LIES. YOU WOULD HAVE STOOD IN ONE PLACE AND WARRIORED THEM ZOMBIES IN THE FACE.
Total warrior. Doesn’t even need to run or move.
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October 19, 2013 at 4:21 pm
Two days in a row, cracking me up. I may be on to something here. . .
October 19, 2013 at 5:02 pm
Good, good, all according to my plan…
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October 20, 2013 at 12:34 am
CUTEST POAST EVER. I can’t with pretzeled M, too funny!
Yeah, the 1st lady was too instense, I’m still trying to recover from the trauma
October 20, 2013 at 2:33 pm
Grrrrl, it was so not cute when we were there in person though…that lady was the worst. You were able to keep up way more than I did.
October 20, 2013 at 2:25 pm
LOVE THIS POST! Your hilarious haha. The one time I tried yoga I felt exactly like you did, but I’m definitely gonna try to give it another go sometime.
Loving your blog btw! :)
October 20, 2013 at 2:33 pm
YES DO IT! Dude, you just got to get the right instructor, I’m telling you! It was like night and day!
Aaaaw, thanks Jessica, right back at cha :)
October 20, 2013 at 6:31 pm
I love your drawings- I keep meaning to comment on them! They are so funny- and your articles are great! xo
October 22, 2013 at 6:28 am
:D Thank you! I’m glad someone is enjoying them, lol. I happen to enjoy your posts as well :)
October 21, 2013 at 12:55 am
Every now and then I remember Kim’s experience at the gym here on campus. She happily skips off to go do some yoga and I go to the exercise bikes. When she got back she looked like she had been mangled by a wild animal. I couldn’t mention anything funny for a week after that since laughter caused her pain. It was different.
October 22, 2013 at 6:30 am
:C Poor kim, it must be a college instructor thing or something, why do they think just cause we’re a younger crowd its okay to rip our heads off with yoga???? not cool. not…cool.
November 13, 2013 at 4:06 pm
That’s so funny!! Do you still go? I went yoga for three months last year, but I got bored at one point….too much breathing and concentrating for me. By the way – do you draw these? They are awesome!
November 13, 2013 at 4:19 pm
Yeah actually I went yesterday!! Lol, its pretty good for me, because I love the breathing techniques. I have anxiety so I always can use some relief by good breathing instruction.
Yeah, I draw these, I am not all that experienced in the art of digital doodles…but I do what I can!
November 13, 2013 at 4:21 pm
They are awesome! Yea I am pretty anxious myself…in fact too anxious to stand the breathing and standing still for ages :)
November 13, 2013 at 4:22 pm
LOL Awww, yeah, well everyone has different things that relax them :)
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